It's fair to say I'm way behind on everything, not the least of which are limited edition cereal promotions. For the past year or two Kellogg's has had a special release during June for Pride Month and I had yet to get my grubby hands on the rare cereal. That all changed on one of my frequent trips to discount grocery chain "Big Lots."
Like I said, I'm behind on everything and had thought that this might have been a mail-away promotion like they had been previously ( I think). But there they were right in front of me, discounted and ripe for the picking. Many of Kellogg's MVP team of mascots all in one place, and in one cereal...it was a piece of history that I just had to add to my shopping cart.
Now all those A-list mascots hanging out together (as well as the name "Together") might give you the impression that this is a mix of all your favorite Kellogg's cereals in one box but that seems to be an unbreachable barrier from the cereal giant. Previously, the box included mini-boxes of each cereal but this year it's a brand new cereal made up of multi-colored hearts. I was a little surprised by this but in hindsight I shouldn't have been since that's what is clearly pictured on the front of the box. Guess I was so excited to find it that my powers of perception were greatly diminished because I didn't even notice until I cracked open the box at home.
No problem for me though, as I'm just happy to be a part of a cereal event....even if I'm super late to the party. But I'm still holding out hope to see Froot Loops, Rice Krispies, Frosted Flakes and the rest of the gang both figuratively and literally "together" next year.
Also you probably recall, "Punky Brewster" was a classic 80s sitcom about a spunky young orphan girl who gets adopted by the Commandant from Police Academy and together they get into primarily low-stakes hijinks.
For example, how about a simple shopping trip for groceries? Low stakes, yet ample opportunity Punky to get up to shenanigans. But what's most interesting for me is to check out the retro 1984 foodstuffs. Like most TV shows they needed to hide specific logos and brands but it's always fun to try to ID some of your favorites.
In order to hide logos, it looks like the production team mainly just turned items backwards and upside down. In the circled box behind Punky you can see a cereal box with a free coupon for a Dairy Queen sundae. This was a promotion by Kellogg's around this time. But take a look at the box next to it. Recognize it?
What we have here is a box of Star Wars C-3POs cereal with a special offer on the back for "Sticker Trading Cards." A quick Google search tells me that most of the time, the back of C-3POs had a cut-out mask of one of the characters but I guess at some point Star Wars fans demanded more and they got it.
Cap'n Crunch was on fire at this time, so much so that he could just give away fistfuls of cash. Not enough to get Punky's attention though as she passes right by the "Win $1,000 Cash" promotion on this box. Not sure what variation of Cap'n Crunch it was but I'm pretty sure it would have stopped the 1984 version of me dead in my tracks if I had been there.
And finally we get a look at some classic, square yellow Oscar Mayer lunch meat packaging. They've changed their look over time and you can still find some similar packages in stores today but there's no yellow like "80s yellow."
There also may or may not have been some Ecto Cooler in the background at one point but this was well before 4K video so we may never know for sure. Mysteries of the grocery aisle abound so it's important to stay vigil.
They say everything is bigger in Texas but do "they" mean cereal too? "Bigger" can be relative, especially in the cereal aisle where birds, rabbits, cavemen and leprechauns all compete for your attention and a place in your shopping cart. In order to stand out from the crowd you need to do something big.
And then along comes our old friend Cap'n Crunch with something we didn't even know we wanted: "Cap'n Crunch's Texas Sized Crunch Berries." It's been way too long since we've had a Texas themed cereal and I was surprised at what a welcome site this was. The "Limited Edition" breakfast treat boasts Crunch Berries that are three times bigger and has the Cap'n decked out in his Texas dude duds.
Depending on your familiarity with Crunch Berries, these may or may not seem "Texas Sized" to you. I have to admit I was a little unimpressed at first glance. I guess it's been awhile since I've had a bowl of the Cap'n's delight since they didn't seem all that big to me. I assume that regular crunch berries are three times smaller but I honestly didn't want to expend the extra effort or cash to buy a regular box for comparison. That would be a lot of cereal to get rid of.
So in order to give you a better idea of their size, I've included some State Fair of Texas tickets for perspective. You can also see here how much bigger the berries are than the regular Cap'n Crunch pieces (do they have a name?). This also got me in the mood for the inevitable "Deep Fried Cap'n Crunch" which must be coming to the State Fair at some point, if it hasn't already (like the Deep Fried Froot Loops I tried awhile back).
While you chew on that, let's head to the back of the box. Sure, the "Texas sized" Crunch Berries might have been a disappointment but the Cap'n makes up for it with some Texas themed activities for your morning meal entertainment. Apparently the "Tex-A-Tron XL" is the machine that makes the bigger Crunch Berries? Regardless, it's up to you to unscramble the names of famous Texas locations in order to fix it.
If Crunch Berries aren't big enough for you then there are plenty of things in Texas that are. Before you drink the milk, take some time to find your favorite Texas "big things" in the Cap'n's word search. Not a bad way to start the morning.
Is Texas the only state in the country to have their own cereal? Probably not. I assume there's some kind of "California Something Or Other Granola" out there somewhere but I'll take the Cap'n over that any day of the week.
It was 1996 and the Marvel machine was a mere shadow of what it would become. Movies were just a pipe dream then and cartoons were king. The spotlight didn't fall on the Avengers as much as it did Spider-Man, the X-Men and the Fantastic Four. With small screen success comes attention from powerful people. And who's more powerful than Ronald McDonald?
...which brings us to the Marvel Super Heroes Happy meal. Now, a more ambitious blog would have a complete breakdown of each of the Happy Meals Toys and perhaps a little bit of information/trivia about them. I don't have that. What I do have is two of the bags used at the time for the promotion (see pic above). I bought them for less than a dollar on eBay and then promptly forgot about them. But when they arrived in the mail today, the happy-go-lucky heroes, with they're word jumbles and brain teasers, inspired me to pop them in the scanner.
The first bag gives us a scenario that involves the visible Invisible Woman who seems to have had the tables turned on her. Her friends are the ones who have disappeared. Can you help her find the Hulk, the Human Torch, Jubilee and Spider-Man? If not, then maybe connect with a smiling Wolverine and help him with his word puzzle.
In yet another Spider-Man/X-Men team-up, Spidey has shot some webs to stick it to his three mutant pals. Can you figure out which line goes to the (still-smiling) Wolverine, Storm and Jubilee? Admittedly, it took me a few attempts.
Grab the scissors and paste and head to the side of the bag. It's time to put these panels of Spidey in the "correct" order. Although the avant-garde side of me would insist that there are multiple "correct" orders and Spider-Man's unique skill set could lead to any number of routes up and down that building. Regardless, let's check out the next bag.
Next up is a game of observation. Find the differences between the right and left side of the room. I'm assuming the obvious ones like Thing/Hulk and Spider-Man/Wolverine totally count. But honestly, it's more difficult finding things that actually do match on each side of the room. Maybe it's more challenging when you're working through a french fry coma.
The other side is more of a group shot of the gang along with a low effort word jumble. It's interesting to note that there only seems to be three X-Men on each bag and only 3/4 of the Fantastic Four. It's always curious to see odd character pairing like this.
If you've been lamenting the lack of mazes on these things, then lament no more. The Thing needs to find the Hulk through this rock wall place. If you've got a spare 6 seconds, give it a try.
You might have noticed the mention of a "Marvel-ous Offer" on the both of these bags. Let's turn the bag over to the final side to see what it could be:
If you like Marvel Super Heroes Happy Meals, odds are you probably like Spider-Man Magazine. All it took was a $1.50 for shipping and handling and this order form from your Happy Meal bag, and two issues of those bad boys would eventually be mailed to you.
So there you have an impromptu look at two 25 year old happy meal bags. If they were to do this promotion today we might still see the Hulk and Spider-Man but the rest would unfortunately be left out in the cold. Here's hoping that another round of hit movies get these guys back on the lunch menu.
Post Cereals has been one of the giants in the breakfast game for quite awhile now. From Grape Nuts to Fruity Pebbles, everybody has a favorite. But cereal dynasties aren't born, they're made. And this one was made by a guy named C.W. Post. If you look into his life you'll find out that he wasn't always such a great guy but but that milk of negativity wasn't enough make his legacy soggy enough to deny him a statue...and I just happened to visit it recently.
And there he sits, perched high upon his throne, welcoming visitors to the Garza County Courthouse in Post, TX. Yes, he has a town named after him. And, yes, he named it after himself after he founded it. Of course, it was originally called "Post City" and it was meant to be a paradise based on his utopian vision which involved prohibiting alcohol and recreational fornication. But currently, it's not that different from any other small Texas town.
Right behind the statue is a Texas Historical marker. It reads:
"Internationally known creator of Post Cereals, advertising genius,
inventor and innovator, founder of Post City in 1906. Through the
purchase of the Curry Comb Ranch and adjacent land approximating 225,000
acres he began his dream of building self-contained model community of
towns and farms. Mr. Post financed, supervised and built town without
profit to himself. Settlers were offered ownership of business or farm
sites far below cost. Mr. Post planned community of debt-free private
ownership in every field of endeavor, and sought to make his vision true
to its purpose."
I'm sure this isn't the only monument to a cereal magnate but my travels have yet to take me to Battle Creek, MI to investigate further. If you want to visit Post's town (and his statue) you can find it in the in the vicinity of the middle of nowhere in the southern end of the Texas panhandle. Don't forget the milk!
Legends never die, they just burn out. And with that bit of bumper sticker wisdom, it's time for a road trip! This time I found myself in Capitan, NM, the final resting place of the legendary Smokey the Bear. He's spending his eternal reward at Smokey Bear Historical Park which, in addition to Smokey's remains, also includes a a short nature trail, museum and gift shop.
Here we see his final resting place. Just like Smokey, it's humble and unassuming. There's a wood carving of young Smokey as they first found him stuck in a tree during a forest fire and a plaque with information about his life and his life's work: preventing forest fires. A little further down the trail is a monument to fallen firefighters as well as benches and overlooks providing a tranquil experience.
The Museum/Gift Shop is a much lighter way to pay homage to Smokey and his life. It's full of every kind of memorabilia you can slap a bear's face on. Games, dolls, books, toys and collectibles from throughout the years are on display to show how fully Smokey worked his way into popular culture (no ashtrays though).
Sadly, none of these items were for sale but they had a few souvenirs available for the Smokey-loving traveler. It's easy to lose track of time as you soak in the Smokey-themed ambience. The nostalgia is palpable and emotions can run high as life and death converge on small New Mexico town. If you find yourself on the road in that area I would definitely recommend stopping by and paying your respects.
The Burger Wars of the 80s left behind a lot of casualties. Everybody wanted to get ahead, and in those days it seemed like very few ideas were rejected. In an effort to differentiate themselves from the McDonald's juggernaut, Burger King decided to lean into the sandwich genre...and they swung for the fences! Let's take a look at what you could find on the menu back in those go-go days of yore.
Roast Beef Sandwich
This one is a no-brainer. If you're in the fast food game and want to get into sandwiching, the first stop along the trail has got to be roast beef. By standing on the shoulders of Arby's, BK was able to offer something different and yet familiar. Patrons were able to stay in their comfort zones but still feel like they were traveling outside the burger zone.
Ham & Cheese Sandwich
And here we have what would have been my order. There's nothing better, when you're not in the mood for something heavy like a burger, than having the old ham & cheese option. Of course, the best ham & cheese is hot ham & cheese but I'm not sure they went that direction with this one. It looks like your standard cold sandwich but sometimes that's just what's needed.
Chicken Sandwich and/or Fish Sandwich
These are definite fast food staples but Burger King can't seem to lock them in. Filet-O-Fish occupies a well worn place on the McDonald's menu but if BK currently has a fish sandwich I couldn't tell you what it's called. And various chicken sandwiches seem to come in and out of fashion at a rate that I just can't seem to keep up with. At least we have a record of these for posterity.
Chopped Beefsteak Sandwich
This one makes me suspicious. How exactly is a Chopped Beefsteak Sandwich different from a hamburger? Other than the shape? I assume the meat is "steak" instead of ground beef but I'm not exactly confident about that. I mean do you really expect to get steak at a fast food place? Maybe it's a semantics thing. All I know is that when a fast food chain offers something with "steak" in the title it almost always involves onions. With onion rings as the main topping, this one is no different.
Veal Parmigiana Sandwich
And here we have probably their most ambitious foray into the sandwich game. Veal may not be P.C. by today's standards, but what interests me is a burger chain's attempt at Italian food. Like McSpaghetti before it, Burger King's Veal Parmigiana Sandwich tried to bring a little of the old country to the drive thru lane.
I can't be sure, but what I believe to be the downfall of all of these sandwiches is that most people go to burger places for burgers. It's the sad reality that discontinues all our favorite weirdo menu items from Burger King, McDonalds and all the other soldiers in Burger Wars past and present.
Some things are a no-brainer. We take a lot for granted these days so what seems obvious in hindsight can sometimes be the result of years if research and experimentation. On the other hand, there is such a thing as the "happy accident." These can happen to anybody when they least expect it and that type of scenario was the basis of a famous ad campaign for Reese's Peanut Butter Cups.
It was the "go-go 80s" (and late 70s) and people wanted what they wanted...and they wanted it now! This applied to snacks as much as it applied to junk bonds. Reese's adopted this spirit of accidental ingenuity with a series of ads showcasing everyday folks inadvertently creating the great taste of chocolate and peanut butter.
Here we have two typical 80s young folks on their way somewhere, probably the arcade, when suddenly the unthinkable happens: a corner collision thrusts the guy's generic chocolate bar into the gal's crock of peanut butter (I'm only now picking up on the subtext). Instead of noticing how weird it is that she was eating peanut butter out of the jar with her hands, the guy pulls his walkman to the side so they could both experience the brand new treat their clumsiness created. Also they're married now (I just made that last part up).
Next up is another meet cute between a young couple, this time at the movies. As was common at the time, the young lady is eating peanut butter with a spoon directly from the jar. I have to assume she brought it from home because I don't recall movie theater concessions selling whole jars in the 80s but perhaps my experience is limited. Regardless, a jump scare brings our couple together just as it brings their chocolate and peanut butter together. They celebrate their new love by picking up some Reese's for a less messy movie snack alternative.
And now, some culture. A night at the opera leads to a new taste sensation. I assume that the actual opera is about the two ingredients because the singer starts the show by praising his beloved peanut butter. Whether or not the pratfall is a part of the story or the fault of bad stage management is unclear. But the results are undeniable: a tasty treat.
The legacy of these commercials remains to this day as it's not uncommon to hear the old "You got chocolate in my peanut butter" joke whenever somebody gets something into something else. I still hold out hope that they're due for a comeback. Maybe if we all started eating peanut butter directly out of the jar in public then it would seem more natural to bring it back.
Tucked away in the corner of the Joplin History & Mineral Museum in Joplin, MO, you'll find the "National Cookie Cutter Historical Museum." It's in between a large exhibit of creepy porcelain dolls and a room filled with creepy circus memorabilia. It's not too big and more of an exhibit than it's own museum but it's definitely the type of thing to catch my eye.
Here, early 20th century antique snowman cookie cutters share shelf space with contemporary Spider-Man cookie cutters and they all live in harmony. Product mascots are no stranger to the cookie cutter genre and several of my favorites were represented here. So I thought I might list a few today on the blog...yeah, that should kill some time...
Before he was de-aged in Crisis of Infinite Earths (or whatever), Mr. Peanut was the suave gentleman who classed up the snack aisle just by being there. The museum has him in a few poses, including a tip of the hat to whoever is about to eat him. I imagine these might work best with peanut butter cookies?
Here we have an older M&M design from the days before each flavor had their own distinct personality. Things were simpler back then. All the little guys wanted to do was have a swim in the chocolate pool, stand under the candy coating shower and hop into your mouth. This cookie cutter, of course, would best be used for those type of chocolate chip cookies that have M&Ms instead of chocolate chips.
Next is a smorgasbord of McDonaldland goodness. There are a couple of Ronald faces, a few Fry Guys and I think the Hamburglar snuck in there. Of course, some Halloween cookie cutters are also included in that Happy Meal Jack-O-Lantern bucket. Any mention of cookies and McDonalds takes me back to the old, discontinued McDonaldland cookies from years back. So I'd used these to make, maybe sugar cookies? I think that's what they were.
Mr. & Mrs. Pillsbury Doughboy have also joined the party. I believe their names are actually Poppin' Fresh and Poppie Fresh and they even have an extended family. But it looks like only these two lovebirds made the (cookie) cut. Since these guys are all about baking, I could see using them to make some kind of ambitious jam-stuffed cookie. Or some kind of fancy jam covered cookie that you'd see in a magazine but never in real life. For some reason I think jam is fancy...
I don't necessarily think of delicious baked goods when I think of the Michelin Man but I guess I should start. The shape of this cutter doesn't include the tire layers of his body so I have to wonder what a Michelin Man cookie would a actually look like. If you were served one, would you have any clue who it was supposed to be? A friendly blob waving hello? As for what kind of cookies I would make with this, maybe something light an airy, you know, like a tire. Can you use these on puff pastries?
There were plenty more cookie cutters to be found at the museum, of course. I saw a rare Blondie and Dagwood set and a U.S. map with cutters representing all the states, even the little weird ones in New England that nobody can remember. If you're ever in the area and want to pay homage to the beautifully mundane, you could do worse.
An earlier entry briefly mentioned the Chicken Dinner Candy Truck which promoted the oddly named Chicken Dinner Candy bars. Here is a vintage picture of it from "Special Interest Autos" magazine.
While trying to wrap my brain around this concept I stumbled onto a better picture of the truck from Charles Phoenix's website.
Apparently the Chicken Dinner Candy Bar contained 0% chicken and was promoted more as a filling meal than as a snack. Since they don't seem to be around anymore we can assume their marketing failed on all fronts.
Further investigation revealed that the company created not one, but a fleet of Chicken Dinner Candy Trucks to spread the word. This picture from the "Kitschy Kitschy Coo" website confirms no less than nine of the trucks existed at one point.
While this proud poultry parade may have disappeared from the highways forever, my own personal travels brought about the discovery of a similar chicken themed vehicle. This picture was taken near Paducah, KY:
This modified El Caballero may or may not have promoted a chicken related product or service. I have no details about it and it will most likely remain shrouded in mystery forever. And that's probably okay.
You thought your lunch was safe...and it essentially is. But adventure calls! Once again a hero rises from the deep fried ashes of Valhalla to insure the herbage and spiciness of your meal will be finger lickin' adequate. So grab a spork and let's dive into the latest extra crispy adventure of Colonel Sanders as he teams up with Green Lantern in "Across the Universe."
Our story begins as Ferris Aircraft monitors the crash landing of...something. As those vultures from the press crowd in to get their pound of chicken flesh, a familiar figure emerges with the payload from the downed spacecraft:
Apparently the Colonel has been testing the process of shooting his new Zinger Sandwich into space...for...some reason. I assume he's trying to break into the intergalactic fast food market. But since Ferris can't get the job done he turns to one of his super powered pals for help.
"Every member of the Green Lantern Corp is working on this." Every single member has ceased protecting their respective sectors in order to help move sandwiches around in space. Seems legit. On the brightest (day) side, that comes with the opportunity to have some sweet GL cameos:
The (entire membership of) Green Lanterns determine that for some reason the space buckets are showing up to their destinations empty. Not so much as an herb or a spice (or that one napkin they give you in the drive thru) make the intergalactic trip. An investigation is in order and that can only mean one thing: time to get deputizin'.
So the Colonel gets his own ring but there's a bit of a missed opportunity in that he doesn't give himself his own custom GL uniform. I guess KFC thought his trademark white suit just couldn't be messed with. But that's the only opportunity they missed since their intergalactic investigation led to a few DC Comics cameos:
After a quick stop at the Source Wall, the cop buddy road trip heads to Rann to say high to Adam Strange. And then a quick stop at Thanagar:
to check in with Hawk Girl. At this point it just seems like Green Lantern is showing off all the cool people he knows to the Colonel. Sanders didn't have enough time to be impressed since they picked up enough clues to lead them right to the prime suspect.
So we then get your standard fight scene as Larfleeze gives his usual spiel about how he's greedy and he wants and wants and wants and that he's totally into these new space sandwiches. But the Colonel has heard enough and, as the true businessman, comes up with the most profitable solution.
Yep, the logical solution to this problem is to give Larfleeze his very own KFC franchise to run. Makes perfect sense, right? Well it doesn't if you don't think about it too much. All that's left is to give a little praise for a job well done:
Great job guys! Just like the last couple of issues with the Flash, it looks like they aren't making print copies of this adventure. Digital only, so grab your copy from Comixology.
