Sunday, January 28, 2018

Bowl Game

It's no secret that the folks at Cap'n Crunch HQ need very little reason to release a new flavor or a new themed box.  Just about every holiday gets one these days but that doesn't seem to be enough for the ambitious sailors in the Cap'n's fleet.

We're in the home stretch of football season and the Super Bowl is right around the corner so it seems like the best time to take a good look at a box of Cap'n Crunch's Touchdown Crunch!


And there's a lot going on with the box.  The main attraction here isn't seeing the Cap'n in all his quarterback glory.  And it's not seeing the Crunchberries slightly smooshed in order to look like footballs.  No, the real touchdown here is being scored on the back of the box:


We got the band back together!  There's a lot to unpack here.  The long neglected supporting cast of the Cap'n Crunch extended universe has a bit of a grid iron reunion for the Limited Edition box.  This is a great opportunity to enlighten any whippersnappers in your home about the Capn's long list of friends and foes.  Let's see who shows up:

Jean LaFoote

The so-called "barefoot pirate" bedeviled the crew of the S.S. Guppy for years in various commercial adventures.  Like so many breakfast antagonists before him, he just wanted to get his hands on a bowl of that sweet breakfast treat.

Crunchberry Beast


The official mascot of Cap'n Crunch Crunch Berries, the Crunchberry Beast was discovered on a remote, exotic island.  Despite the rumors you may have heard, C.B. doesn't poop crunchberries, he eats them.

Magnolia Bulkhead


Another antagonist, this one is as obsessed with Cap'n Crunch the man as she is with Cap'n Crunch the cereal.  I don't think she's ever gotten her hands on either.

Henry S. Hippo


I never tasted "Punch Crunch" but I assume they tasted like...Fruit Punch, I guess.  Doesn't really sound that appealing to me.  I guess that's why it's not around anymore.  Anyway, this guy was the mascot for it.

One of the Soggies


Now these guys were the real deal.  Back in my prime cereal eating days, the Soggies were the ultimate enemies of a cereal that prides itself on its crunchiness.  There were several of them and I think they had names but since I don't remember them, I'll call this guy "the one with the hat."

Crunchling


This little guy was a part of a Cap'n Crunch video game from a few years back.  He may be the most obscure inclusion in this whole block party mess. 

"And the Rest"


So here we have Smedley, the mascot for Peanut Butter Crunch.  I always though he was the most underrated crew member since he's the only other one with a Captain's hat.  Next is Dave, one of the crew members on the Guppy who is clearly a Dallas Cowboys fan.  And lastly is the loyal first mate, Seadog.

All in all, not a bad turnout.  And, yes, I know Carlyle and some rando pirates are also in the stands.  And maybe that dolphin representing the Miami Dolphins had a cameo in one of the commercials too.  It's ok to leave a little on the table...just not in the bowl.


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